I've recently been seeking out inspirational or motivational reads that will speak to me, specifically works from women of color. I wanted to hear advice and wisdom from black women who have succeeded professionally and/or personally, and learn from their journeys. I heard that the Queen of TGIT (if you don't know what that is we can't be friends), Shonda Rhimes, wrote a book not too long ago and knew I had to order it. Two days later "Year of Yes" came in the mail.


Written with the same flair and charisma as her Scandal monologues, "Year of Yes" was empowering, funny and insightful. Rhimes talks about her struggles with having it all and still being unhappy. She questions how she came to be so miserable, and decides that saying no to any and everything was to blame. She declined speaking engagements, parties, interviews, playing with her children and other significant events. So, she pushes herself to say YES to everything she's asked. Her year of yes challenges her to face her fears, confront her insecurities and grow as a woman and mother. Her story inspired me to also push myself to say yes to things I would normally decline.  One of the first ways I practiced this was saying "yes" to zip lining, even though heights terrify me and I just knew I was going to throw up and die.

BUT I made it! I faced my fear of heights, said yes and had a terrifying, but thrilling, time flying through the sky. By saying yes you open yourself up to new experiences and opportunities. You meet and engage with more people, create once-in-a-lifetime memories and overall make more of your life. I plan on continuing to say yes and excited to see where that leads me.

Channeling our inner 'Yonce at the studio, precursor to the "Fireman Spin"

I recently read a TIME article by Precious Lee, a plus-size model, where she speaks on finding self-confidence. 

"If you’re feeling bad about yourself, you have to take the moment you’re in and turn it around by doing something that makes you feel beautiful. I work out regularly and eat a balanced diet not because I want to look a certain way but because I know it will make me feel beautiful. And it doesn’t have to be at all related to the physical. If someone posts a hurtful comment about me, I’ll post a positive meme to take that negative energy and turn it around. Doing something that makes you feel great—whether it’s volunteering or taking a dance class —is a great way to boost your confidence." 

Reading her words reminded me of a recent class I took with my line sisters during our Deltaversary trip to Vegas. One our last day together we decided to do something spontaneous and a little unorthodox...pole dancing! 



When my line sister originally suggested we take the class I wasn't sure if I wanted to do it. I had never pole danced before and the likelihood of me falling off the pole was pretty high (don't plan on making it rain anytime soon). I was also a little wary because pole dancing has a bit of a stigma in some circles. However, by the end of the class we had fun, worked out and felt great! 

Not only is it fun and creative, but pole dancing is also highly effective workout, tightening your core and building upper body strength. Now that I'm back in Chicago, I've signed up for additional classes at Flirty Girl Fitness along with piloxing, yoga and other dance classes. Getting in touch with your feminine and sultry side can give you the body confidence to know that you are fabulous at any size!

According to Pew Research Center, 74% of online adults and 89% of millennials, aged 18-39, use social networking sites. Now more than ever, friends, families and employers expect you to be fully engaged in social media. Our society's emphasis on social has been a catalyst for positive change in many ways. But what happens when you're overloaded with the snaps, tweets and Tumblr posts?

I found myself asking that question earlier this week. Having active social media presence and being up-to-date on the newest app is essential in today's world. This is especially true if you're if you work in the media realm. But too much of anything can be bad for you! I found myself feeling drained and distracted from all the messaging, and yet could not stop checking my pages.

via GIPHY
(This me, btw)

Anxious to to get a better handle on my social media woes, I sought some advice and did some research. If you find yourself feeling over statured with social, here are four ways to effectively use social without it using you:

I find myself asking the question, how do you stay motivated surrounded by defeating news? Nearly a year after graduating with my master's degree from Northwestern and I am still on the path to secure the future I want for myself. As each day passes the battle becomes more difficult. It is hard to stay positive when life throws your curveballs. You begin to question your decisions, your drive, your skill-set; overthinking and worry are a part of your daily routine. But it is during times like these that I seek out songs, books and people that reinforce my motivation and confidence. This week it was the new Beyonce album, Lemonade. As a proud member of the Beyhive 🐝🍋, I eagerly awaited the release of Bey's new album and listened to the full project the night it dropped. A true work of art, Lemonade touched on a wide array of emotions and the #blackgirlmagic was pouring out of every song, every visual. I was fully immersed in my emotions when the track, "Freedom", came on and I received the small gift I needed to get through this week:

"I'ma keep running, because a winner doesn't quit on themselves."   

And that's exactly what I plan to do.

Courtesy of Chicago Mag

Courtesy of The Wild Hare

If there is one thing I've learned, it's that life has a way of distracting you. In the many months since I last blogged, I have moved to a new city, started graduate school, began a new job, experienced a bad break-up and re-focused my life in many ways. I am now an official Wildcat (although my heart still bleeds Maize and Blue) attending Medill School of Journalism at Northwestern University!

Computer opened, textbook ready-let the studying begin

The beautiful city of Chicago from my plane seat

The experience of moving to Chicago and reporting for Medill has been amazing thus far. I've gotten to meet a host of characters and explore many neighborhoods, from "the 100s" on the South Side to the artsy, hipsters of the far North Side. I have heard from many people say that graduate school is not as difficult as undergrad. That is true, it's not, HOWEVER, it is very time-consuming and tiring. Based on my first quarter of highs and lows here is some advice on how to survive the grad school grind:

I have been neglectful to my blog over the past three months. Due to a series of unfortunate events, stressful circumstances, and dwindling morale I lost my motivation to write. Like the winter weather that surrounded me, I felt dreary and lifeless. Miserable at my retail job, knowing I had the intellect and credentials for much more, and stagnate living at home with my family. However, I have recently learned to never doubt the plan for your life and that patience really is a virtue. Since those dark days of winter, I have been blessed with three amazing opportunities!